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The Mel Robbins Podcast
The #1 Hack for Being More Productive Tomorrow
The #1 Hack for Being More Productive Tomorrow

The #1 Hack for Being More Productive Tomorrow

The Mel Robbins PodcastGo to Podcast Page

Mel Robbins
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21 Clips
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Feb 6, 2023
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Episode Summary
Episode Transcript
0:01
Hey, it's your friend Mel and welcome to another amazing episode of the Mel Robbins podcast.
0:11
Welcome,
0:12
my name is Mal. I'm a New York Times bestselling author and one of the most respected experts in the world on change and motivation. I'm so excited to be here because today's conversation is incredibly tactical and it's going to change your perspective. Immediately on something you probably don't think a lot about but it's a really powerful concept but I didn't really get serious about this topic until
0:41
Till a few years ago
0:42
really and the topic that I'm talking about
0:46
is your morning routine and why a morning routine is so important for your
0:53
success. Because when you create a
0:57
rock-solid morning routine, you will create a better morning for yourself and that creates a better day for yourself and that day becomes a better week and that week becomes a better month and that month becomes a better year. And next thing, you know,
1:12
Along the way you
1:13
became a better you and that's the whole point of all of this.
1:18
So I'm going to start this
1:19
conversation today by talking about the single
1:22
biggest hack that has helped me create a
1:27
rock-solid morning.
1:28
Routine here is the hack your morning
1:33
routine Begins the night before I'm going to say that again. If you want to master
1:40
A rock solid morning routine and
1:42
trust me, you do.
1:46
Your morning routine Begins the night before and that's we're going to talk about today. We're going to talk about
1:53
five simple things. These are game changers. These are not rocket science. You don't need a PhD
1:59
to understand this, but let me tell you something. When you put this into practice, you will experience a level of holy shit transformation. That is hard to put into words because the decisions that you make at night determine who you are. When you wake up in the
2:15
Morning, and you have a choice every evening to either set the future, you up for success,
2:22
for he's, for confidence for winning, or you can make decisions in the evening that set you up to feel like shit to be behind to have a ton of stuff to do that. You could have done last night
2:38
your decisions, determine everything. And so I really want to Rattle the cage today and get you to think differently.
2:45
About the night. I know that your days are stressful. Mine are too. That's
2:50
why so many of us
2:52
engage in what's called Revenge procrastination at night, where you feel resentful of the fact that work took up your entire day. And now, you're going to get revenge by mindlessly scrolling at night or plowing through a bottle of wine, or doing nothing to set yourself up because you're tired or you're mad and you deserve to relax. I agree. You do deserve to
3:15
Acts. But if
3:17
you were to just do these five things and I'm going to recommend you would have time to relax but you would also set the you that's going to wake up tomorrow, morning up for a clean slate day, where you wake up, you feel great, you're set up for success. And that is going to be a positive Domino that triggers. A ton of positive stuff to happen every day. That's what we're talking about because the choices you
3:44
make at night.
3:45
Right? Determine whether or not. The next day is going to be easy and empowering
3:51
or whether or not you are going to wake up to a morning like the old Mel Robbins used to wake up to and whether you're aware of it or not, I
4:01
just want you to stop and
4:02
consider something right now in your life. You already have an evening routine in place.
4:09
You already have a morning routine and today because the big hack is understanding that a great morning routine starts the night before you and I are going to focus on your current evening routine and I as your friend, I'm going to challenge you to change it. So let's do a quick experiment. Okay I want you just to stop.
4:32
Think about the night in front of you and be honest, what
4:38
is the average evening in your current life? Look like
4:43
I'll go first because back when I
4:45
was really struggling the old Mel I now realize how much my evening routine was contributing to the fact that I was struggling so much and then I'm going to walk you through the five things that the new, the current Mel Robbins does every single night.
5:02
Right. So here's what the old Mel's evening routine looked like many years ago,
5:10
I would either come home from
5:12
work or I would roll down stairs from working on my laptop all day. But I'd crack open a bottle of wine. I'd cook dinner by trying to throw something together, that was in the fridge because I hadn't really planned anything. I'd throw a load of laundry in here and there. And then, you know what
5:28
I do? I'd basically slumped down on the
5:31
couch and I'd start.
5:32
And through social media
5:34
after dinner and helping the kids. With the homework, you might find the old Mel Robbins just sort
5:40
of laying there in the couch with the bottle half drained glass of wine in hand. I got a movie or some series on the television. I got my phone in my hand, i'm zoning out. I'm scrolling along during the commercials, the old Mel Robbins I'd probably turn to Chris complain about my day. Then I'd look over at the kitchen and I'd see that the counters were full of
6:02
Crap from the dinner that we had cooked or from the backpacks that we had emptied, or the laptops that we had put there. The kids homework was typically sprawled out among the island. And I would say to myself this this was the routine of the old Mel
6:15
Robbins. I should probably clean that up
6:18
over the next commercial break
6:20
and I'd say that over and over again. I should probably pack their lunches,
6:24
I should probably turn off the TV and read a book. I should probably move the laundry from the washer to the dryer. So it doesn't sit there.
6:32
Five days and then, get that disgusting damp old towels smell to it. Then I have to rewash it again. I know you do that too and all
6:39
of a sudden it would be almost 11:00 before. I knew it,
6:44
I would have polished off that bottle of wine. I'd get up and I'd clear off the counters and put most of the dishes into the sink. A few of them into the dishwasher, I do my favorite cleaning trick which is instead of scrubbing and cleaning the
7:00
pans that I had cooked in Turin.
7:02
I just fill them up
7:03
with warm soapy water and let them soak because I tell myself it's going to be easier to clean them in the morning if they soak all night. Now, by this point, I'm exhausted, I'm buzzed on the wine. I'm tired from a long day, I kind of resent the fact that I have more to do and it's now 11:15 and I'd start to tell myself. Well, I'll just pack the kids lunches tomorrow, and then I would turn off the light side. Let the dog out. One more time, I'd lock the doors.
7:32
And I would collapse
7:35
into bed with my phone. Now it would take the old Mel Robbins a little time to fall asleep. Why?
7:43
Because while I was laying there with Chris sound asleep next to me, I would scroll through my phone, I would check out social media. I'd read the news and eventually I would zone
7:55
out. And as I was lying there,
7:58
I'd feel kind of annoyed that Chris had gone to bed earlier.
8:02
He had already drifted off
8:03
to sleep and at some point I'd realize, oh my God. It's
8:07
like almost 1:00 in the
8:08
morning. How did it get? So late? And for all
8:12
of my fellow procrastinators out there,
8:14
you know, those of us who pulled all-nighters in
8:17
college, who
8:18
thought tomorrow
8:20
tomorrow is a great day to pack the bags to start my workout routine to clean up. The kitchen to set myself up for Success. Tomorrow is the day when the new me.
8:32
Will emerge for my beauty sleep tonight. I will shake off that hangover from the bottle of wine that I've had. I'll pop a couple Advil and I will make a fresh start. Tomorrow, is the fresh
8:43
start that? Well, that
8:46
was the old Mel Robbins. I used to have all kinds of stories about myself for. Why it is that, you know, I just couldn't get my
8:53
act together, it's
8:55
just so hard for me to wind down. After a long work day, I have trouble falling asleep, I need a glass of wine or two or three or
9:02
For in order to relax and to fall asleep. But, you know, I'm just not a morning person. That's why I can't get up earlier. I don't know why I wake up and I feel anxious and slightly hungover,
9:13
but, you know, I'm just not the kind
9:16
of person that ever just brings out of bed and I got so much work that I just want to relax at night. What's the big deal? And the problem with this is that my nights did not set me up to have a relaxing morning. Let me
9:32
Tell you what the old Mel Robbins life was like thank
9:35
God. Chris is not on this episode because he would really describe it in a way that makes me feel like a loser. So I would usually need to get those kids out the door and to the
9:45
bus by 7:30, I would set several alarms in my
9:50
phone, the first one to go off at 5:45 but that's not actually what I'm getting up. That's just alarm number one and then I'd set another alarm for about, you know, 6:00 and then I'd said another one for
10:02
18. And then another one for 6:30. And then another one for 6:45, which was kind of the time that I felt like I needed to get out of bed because that's only 45 minutes to get three kids out the door, and lunch is packed and everything cleaned up, but I'd usually honestly roll out of bed at the last alarm, which was like the emergency alarm, which was 715 sound, familiar,
10:23
don't tell me, you don't do this. You do this. And I want you to just consider what is that act of setting multiple.
10:32
Arms, say to your
10:33
subconscious.
10:35
Think about what those actions communicate to you. I'll tell you what they communicated about the old
10:41
Mel Robbins. Waking up is hard. Getting up is hard, mornings, are hard. Life, is an obligation being in bed. Is better than being awake. I don't want to get out of it. I don't want to start my day. There is nothing. I'm looking forward to today. I have nothing to get out of bed for that. Actually makes me happy, which is why this is going to be a slow death march for me of alarms that are summoning me to roll.
11:04
All out of this warm bed and actually start this
11:08
day.
11:10
I wasn't a morning person because the old Mel Robbins chose not to be one. The old Mel Robbins literally did absolutely nothing the night before to set herself up for Success. If you think about all the choices that I was making because deciding to just zone out in front of TV, that's a choice.
11:37
Leaving the dishes for tomorrow morning, that's a choice.
11:40
Not packing lunches to set yourself up for success and that that that's a choice that is part of your routine. And if you don't watch it you're going to become like the old Mel Robbins. You're going to be making your life harder for yourself without even realizing it. And one of the main reasons why I kept doing it is because I
11:56
kept telling myself, I'm so tired. I don't want to do anything. I've worked all day and by doing that I was just making it harder. Now, thankfully, I finally had this
12:06
Turning Point
12:06
point, when I
12:07
realized,
12:09
I don't want my mornings to be a five-alarm fire drill because there is nothing fun about waking up late and feeling frustrated and then being stressed at your kids and then yelling at
12:20
them to move faster because you yourself didn't get up on time and then scrambling to pack the lunches in the drama that comes with that and then trying to get them to eat when you haven't even prepared anything and then finding that permission slip that they needed
12:33
that you signed last night. But you didn't put it in a place that you could find it simply because you were not thinking
12:39
about the fact that you deserve to wake up in a powerful way, you deserve to complete your day in a way that supports you
12:50
I didn't have to race out the door. I didn't have to
12:53
start my day. Mad at my husband frustrated by the frenzied going
12:57
from literally sleeping to a
13:00
panic attack every single morning and then hopping in the car to commute to work to see that. Oh my God, I have zero gas in the tank because I was too tired when I drove home last night to stop and I just wanted to get home. So I didn't fill up the tank and now I'm running late and now
13:15
I'm on the highway and I'm pulling on it the exact time the
13:20
Traffic, literally doubles. Why do I keep doing this to myself? And here's something interesting.
13:32
Doesn't it make sense that if I start my day like that
13:37
I'm probably making myself more stressed and tired all day long. That that crazy morning is like a domino that falls and it triggers more stress, and more being behind and more draining energy. So that you're constantly feeling, like you're always reacting because you are because you said,
14:02
Up that way, I know this because I lived it for years, and I just kept saying all the
14:08
disempowering thing, why can't it be like it? Why don't I have discipline? Why don't I do this?
14:12
And I didn't
14:13
understand how to break this down in a way that not only makes sense, but it's supported by the
14:20
research and I think I was rolling home. Completely spent, not because work was long. Not because the day was stressful but because
14:31
My entire experience of waking up and starting the day
14:36
had started that way
14:38
that I was looking forward to that bottle of wine. The second, the kids got on the bus because I had spent the 45 minutes. I was awake, running around like the Tasmanian devil and I'm here to tell
14:49
you there is an easier way, think about how many mornings you wake up and you bemoan the choices you made last
14:57
night. How many times have you woken up your leg?
15:00
I shouldn't had so much to do.
15:02
Angkor. What about when you wake up and you had fast food at 1:00 in the morning, on the way home from some event and now you've got a burrito bomb and your stomach and you're like a kid, do the to myself again and then what do you do? You do it to yourself again.
15:16
What if,
15:17
instead of bemoaning the choices that you made last
15:21
knife? What if you got
15:23
serious, about making sure that the future you? The one that's waking up tomorrow
15:29
morning is actually waking up feeling.
15:31
Being really good. It
15:33
sucks to wake up and be anxious every morning because you drank almost every night. And the number one symptom of a
15:41
hangover is freaking anxiety
15:43
because the chemicals in your body are getting processed and when the chemicals could process and you have a dump of cortisol in the dopamine drops and you got the poison of al-kahf course you have anxiety,
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don't sit there and feel anxious do something about it
15:59
and that brings me back to this hack.
16:03
You can make this easier,
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you can be a different person,
16:08
your morning routine
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is everything when it comes to success and happiness and putting yourself first and finding the time that you deserve to focus on what matters to you and that incredible morning
16:21
routine has to begin the night before.
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That's the
16:25
hack. And
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that's what changed everything for me. I am not the old Mel Robbins. In fact, just ask
16:31
Bribing what my life used to be? Like is giving me a stomachache when I think about how much unnecessary stress and drama. I created for myself, for my kids, for my
16:43
husband, it wasn't fun for anybody, and so I'm not like that anymore.
16:49
I am a completely different person because I decided I wanted to be a completely different person and you don't have to be a Navy SEAL, you don't have to be a competitive athlete, you don't have to run a billion dollar company to understand that setting yourself up the night before is the secret to waking up and having a great morning and when you have a great morning it's easier to have a great day. That's how this
17:19
Old,
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how do you end the day?
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How do you wind things down? And put yourself to
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bed. I want you to stop
17:28
and think about something. You already have a routine about how you shut down your house, or your
17:33
apartment. Think about it. Do you ever go to bed and not lock the door. Now you go to bed and turn the lights off. Of course you turn the lights off.
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Do you like
17:47
make sure your pets are where they need to be? Of course, you do, do you turn off the TV? Of course you
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do. All of these things that you do to
17:54
turn off and shut down the house at night. You have a routine about what you physically do in your space or your home.
18:03
There is this shutting down that you do that is
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routine. You don't even think about it. And I think about it, it's almost like we're putting the house to
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bed. It's easy to
18:14
think about the list of things that you
18:16
do without even being conscious of it.
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When it comes to your physical environment, what are the things that you and I can do to help you do that emotionally and psychologically,
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I want you to
18:32
join me in getting serious about your evening routine starting tonight. I want you to embrace the fact that your morning's will be 100 times better if you set yourself up.
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Up for Success starting tonight. All right
18:53
we need to take a quick
18:53
pause and hear a short word from our sponsors because all this is brought to you at zero cost and I absolutely love that and when we come back I'm going to explain the five simple steps that I have put to use in my own life. That is made an extraordinary difference.
19:19
Welcome back. I'm Mel Robbins. I'm so thrilled. You're here. We are talking about the number one, hack to creating a rock-solid morning routine and that is by focusing on getting your evening, right? Putting yourself to bed, winding your day down in a really empowering way. I promise to share the five, simple steps that I have put into action in my own life and here they are. Step number one, use.
19:45
The 321 rule, the 321 rule is very simple here. It is 3 hours before bedtime. Stop eating and drinking alcohol.
19:55
Two hours before bedtime. Stop working
19:58
and one hour before bedtime shut down the screens.
20:02
You do the 321 rule, you're going to get a great night's sleep and you're not going to be so stressed. I'm going to repeat it one more time. This is the 321 Rule and it Taps into all kinds of research about getting a better night's sleep about stress about your mind, being able to be calmer, so you can get a better night's sleep and about the
20:25
Impact on screens and blue light on your ability, to get a good night sleep. So here it is. Three hours before bedtime. You are going to stop eating and drinking alcohol. And for me, because I go to bed early that meant we had to move the dinner time a little bit
20:41
earlier. Second, two
20:43
hours before bedtime stop working. Stop working. One of the reasons why you may have trouble sleeping or relaxing or stopping racing thoughts or you may be waking up in the middle of the
20:55
It is because you're working too close to your bedtime. So your thoughts are spinning and your stress levels high. So two hours before bed, stop working. And finally one hour before bed, you got to shut down the screen time. The blue light on your screens, your laptop, your phone. It is interfering with your brain's ability to shut down and sleep. So the 321 rule will make a huge difference in your life.
21:21
Second this rule, I call how
21:25
How can you make things easier for yourself?
21:29
Let me
21:29
unpack this. When I look back on periods of my life where it was a real struggle to stick to habits, or to stay, calm and confident. It was because I was making my life harder. I was relying on Willpower or discipline or remembering to do things and when it dawned on me,
21:51
hey, there are
21:53
simple things that you could do Mel.
21:55
That would make your life. A hell of a lot easier, especially in the morning. There are decisions that you could make at
22:01
night. There are simple
22:03
things that you could do in order to move the ball down the field at night. So when you wake up in the morning, you don't have to do so much thinking. So let me give you some examples of this one way that I make my life easier in the morning is every single night. I lay my exercise clothes out on the floor
22:23
in my bedroom or
22:25
Heck even in the hotel.
22:27
So I've been on a business trip. Now, this is day 15 of a business trip, hitting six different cities and I move my body every day and I know if I'm going to get up its 6:00 in the morning in a hotel, I don't want to be fumbling around in the dark, looking for the pair of tights that are actually clean instead of having to turn the clothes inside out to figure out what I could put on my body.
22:51
Do not do that in the morning.
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You're creating too much resistance.
22:55
Extensive requires too much energy and thinking, make it
22:58
easier the night before, as you're walking around your hotel room, brushing your teeth, or your, you know, washing your face with just lay your exercise clothes out on the floor, pick it easier that way, they're there for you in the more you don't even have to think about it. Isn't that fantastic? And if you've raised kids, how
23:16
do you make mornings easier with
23:17
kids, you pack their lunches the night before you assemble their backpacks by the door. You put their hockey
23:24
stick
23:24
Or their tennis rackets or their cleats, the things that they need
23:27
to remember, right there for you and me. Here's
23:31
how you can do that for yourself as an adult.
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Let's say you have a commitment
23:36
every single morning, as part of your morning routine to
23:38
journal more or to drink more water, here's a great idea. Put the water bottle filled up by the coffee pot.
23:48
Put the journal where you're going to do your journaling exercises by the coffee pot,
23:53
why?
23:55
Out because you're going to make a cup of
23:57
coffee tomorrow morning.
23:58
So have it ready there
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so you don't have to make the cup of coffee and then go oh, wait a minute, I was going to. Where'd I put that? Journals it in the back, where's the
24:06
backpack? Now it's right there, have your things by the door,
24:12
put healthy foods, in the front of the fridge, have a little dish that you always put your car keys in. We talked about this concept of make it easier in the episode that we did.
24:24
All about habits called five essential hacks. I'm using to make new habits stick. You guys ate that episode up. We will put a link to it in the show notes, but it's all about something called activation energy. When you lay your exercise clothes out, when you put your water bottle by the coffee maker, when you pack lunches, the night before, it takes less energy than having to do it. When you're stressed out in the morning, you don't even have to think about it. You've set yourself up for success.
24:55
That means you're going to be less stressed, and it means the thing that you might blow off. If it's
25:00
hard in the morning, like exercise,
25:03
you're more likely to get it done. Why? Because you've made it
25:06
easier for you.
25:07
You have supported the new. You, how cool is this? Is like a little gift that you're giving yourself. The third rule is, give yourself a clean slate. I also like to call this flushing. The toilet. Okay. Like when you go to bed at night, you
25:24
Flush the toilet when you use it, right? Why? Because you do
25:27
not want the mess from last night there, to greet you in the morning. So why on Earth would you do
25:33
that in your kitchen? Empty the sink load the
25:37
dishwasher clear off the counters. Wipe them down.
25:40
Why? Well logic
25:42
tomorrow morning after you wake up and you go to the bathroom, where's the first place we all go in our apartment or home? We go to the kitchen. Would you rather see
25:54
See, a kitchen that has last night's dishes. Pots soaking in the sink and stuff. Scattered all over the place from yesterday, all of which is unfinished business from yesterday.
26:11
Or would you feel more empowered if you walked into the kitchen? And the counters were clear
26:20
and things were organized and there was nothing that you needed to clean up.
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The answer is obvious, do not take today's
26:30
messes into tomorrow
26:33
and that's always been a huge thing for me
26:36
because if I walk into the kitchen in the morning and I see a ton of dirty dishes or I see stuff all over the
26:43
island. It's a trigger and my day goes downhill because I'm immediately
26:50
distracted. I'm immediately feeling like I should have done this last night. I should have put these dishes now this
26:56
This pot that has been soaking in the sink with all of the the suds in it. The subs are gone and the water is ice cold and disgusting and oily. I don't want to put my hands in
27:06
that and half the stuff hasn't soaked off anyway and so I didn't make it easier. I actually made it harder and grocer and more disgusting. And now it takes me even more time. So this idea of, for me of clearing the counters, no dishes in the sink, nothing on the counters. It means I am waking up to a
27:26
Brand-new Clean Slate today, metaphorically visually everything. And so how can you do this?
27:34
Think about this as part of the non-negotiables, when you turn off the lights and lock the front door, do a quick Loop through the kitchen and take five lousy minutes to pull it together. Clear off the counters, get everything in the dishwasher or finish the dishes.
27:51
Get it done
27:52
because I promise you psychologically walking
27:56
Into a
27:57
physically Clean Slate.
28:00
Helps you mentally feel like you've been given the gift of one when you wake up in the morning. So that's the first three when we come back. I'm going to walk you through rules number four, and five and you're not gonna want to miss this.
28:24
A it smell. And we are on rule number four, for setting up and creating a powerful evening routine that is going to launch you into an amazing day tomorrow. So starting tonight rule number four, get super intentional about setting your alarm, and here's how you do it. There is no old Mel Robbins going on here. There is no five alarms that
28:50
You're setting, as you coax yourself out of bed, there is no backup plan here.
28:56
Get intentional What freaking time to you, need to get up like for real, let's not do the fake
29:04
math. That a lot of us do where we think that we can brush our teeth, commute to work Pack 3, lunches and finish, last night's homework in a matter of 10 minutes, you can't do that. Okay, you just
29:14
can't. So tonight when you set your alarm, I want you to make
29:19
A decision
29:21
about the person you are
29:23
becoming.
29:25
I'm going to say that again.
29:27
Tonight, when you set
29:28
your alarm, make a decision about the person. You are becoming
29:35
tonight
29:37
be very intentional about what you truly need to start your day.
29:43
Feeling,
29:44
supported
29:46
confident at ease. How much time do you need to truly? Put yourself first?
29:55
Take care of your health
29:57
and put a little bit of
29:59
time into something that matters to you.
30:03
Now I want to
30:04
just pause on this for just a second. Okay, I think this is where most of us get it wrong that your alarm has probably been set for the same time for years and you haven't stopped to truly think about the person that you're
30:20
becoming
30:22
and when you think about the person that you want to become and this next chapter of your life, what does that person's morning routine? Look like how much time do you truly one?
30:33
Look, I get it. You might have to wake up
30:35
45 minutes earlier.
30:36
I get it. You might not be a morning person
30:40
and I'm going to prove to you as we get to know each other that you don't have
30:44
to be.
30:45
You don't have to be a morning person
30:47
and you can still create a rock-solid evening routine and a rock-solid morning routine. You don't have to be a morning person and you can learn and support yourself and getting up 30 minutes earlier, because that is how much time you need in order to set your day up for success and see, I think a lot of us really lose the opportunity of a fresh start, and a new morning, and the structure of that, because we're not,
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And channel and honest with ourselves about what we actually need. And what I've come to learn, the more intentional that I get with myself is I need a lot of time in the morning. I need more time than the old Mel Robbins was giving herself because I not only need time to roll out of bed and to brush my teeth and to high five, the mirror and to move my body, and to set my intention, and to do all that before I help Chris, or the kids, or the dogs, or anybody else that?
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It works for me or anybody else that follows me or anything else that might be on my phone that I
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need. Actually if I'm being honest I need about 90 minutes. I can get it done in 30 in a pinch. But I need about 90 if I don't
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want to be rushed if I don't want to be resentful, if I don't want the things that I really need to do so that I can start my day
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feeling powerful and
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empowered. That's true.
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Truly what I need. I want you to be honest with yourself and I want you to ask yourself this question.
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What time
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do you truly need to wake
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up?
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To make it easier to support yourself. What would the future you say?
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And if you can't think of a time, I'll give you one
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set your alarm one hour earlier than you normally do.
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Because this is
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more than a wake-up call. This is more than setting an alarm.
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What I'm asking you to do is I'm asking you to make a promise because when you set the alarm clock tonight,
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what you're really doing is, you're making a promise to yourself,
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you're making.
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Okay, promise
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that when that alarm rings, you're going to wake up, you're going to get up and you're going to get going.
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And this is why it's
33:17
important for you to be intentional. Not casual about setting that alarm.
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But intentional because tonight when you set that alarm clock,
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You're making a promise. And when you look at it
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that way, when that alarm rings tomorrow
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morning,
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It's about keeping that promise to yourself.
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That's what the act of waking up, becomes
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that the evening you set
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up the future, you the tomorrow, you the person, you're becoming with a clean
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slate and a promise, for how much
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time it is that you truly need and deserve every morning. And if you can start to flip, how you think about that alarm, how you set it and what it signals.
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When it sounds in the morning that promises there to be kept, it will shift what you think about the opportunities of
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the morning and the time that you need to truly
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honor yourself and put yourself
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first. Now before we get to the final rule,
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which is a beautiful rule, that you're going to hate like crazy but it's the most powerful one of all. I just want to recap the other four rules. We've talked about the three two,
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Roll. We've talked about this mindset flip of how can I make things easier for myself? We've also talked about the importance of giving yourself a physical Clean Slate so you can have a mental clean slate and we just covered the importance of getting super intentional about setting your alarm and considering it a promise that you are making and keeping with your future self.
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And finally,
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number five, before you tuck yourself in tuck, your
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Phone into the bathroom.
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That's right. No phone in
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the bedroom, I want it in the bathroom and the closet in the kitchen. Once everything else is handled, the only thing that is allowed on that clear counter in the kitchen, is your phone plugged in? Because I have one rule that has changed my life and that rule is something I do every single evening. It is a critical part of my evening routine. And that is there is no phone in the bedroom period and starting tonight.
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I want you to try this. It's a lot harder than it seems, you are about to realize how addicted you are to your phone, how it interferes, with your ability to have a powerful evening routine, you're also going to see firsthand how it is likely interfering with your ability to fall asleep and stay asleep.
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So before you tuck yourself in Tuck that phone
35:59
in anywhere, but the bedroom and here's how this is going to work, all you're going to do is just pick a spot that you're going to charge.
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Your phone overnight. And for those of you that have kids that need to reach you or job that needs to reach you, I totally get that on the same. So here's how you
36:16
deal with that. You
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turn the ringer on and you tell everybody in your life, I don't sleep with my phone but the ringer is on. If you have an emergency call me
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you will hear the phone ringing in the
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middle of the night and what's really interesting ever since I've done this. And I've now done this for years is that
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people don't call you in the middle of night, unless it's truly
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Emergency, but they will text and Snapchat you all night long and that'll keep you awake. Don't tell me that it doesn't. And so this way, you know that you can fall asleep and that somebody can reach you but you're not going to be distracted by it because it's not going to be
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near you. If you use your phone as an alarm, excellent, I do too and the good news about that is
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that if your phone is outside of the bedroom and it's also your alarm when it goes off in the morning, you have no choice but to get out of bed and so I kind of like that hack.
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So in the moment, I hate that hack when I hear the alarm going off, but you could also just buy a cheap alarm clock or use a watch or something else. If you're no longer using your phone as an alarm. I feel so strongly about this because you've just spent your entire day letting the whole world have access to you. Because that's what you're doing when you're watching the news or responding to email or sitting on Zoom calls, or you're just scrolling mindlessly through social media, you are allowing the world to steal your attention to child.
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Your brain power with things that really don't matter. And honestly, there is nothing on your phone that is going to help you sleep tonight. The stuff that's on your phone is going to get you stressed out. It's going to get you worked up. It's going to make you stay awake and that's why you can't have it near you. You can't trust yourself. We have to get the one thing that's been robbing you of your attention and energy all day away from you. Do not let people have access to you once you get into your bedroom, do not let
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The thing that you gave your attention to all day long, be the thing that is distracting you at night, you deserve a great night's sleep and you are just not going
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to get it. If that phone is
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sitting next to you on the bedside table
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and don't lie to me, like, we're friends at this point, the
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majority of us sleep with our phones. I shouldn't even say us because I do not but the majority of people including you have that phone in your bed, it's right there. You look at it. You want to know something
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disgusting. A third of people.
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Check email in the middle of the night. What are you doing? Email in the middle of the night, even if you can't sleep. What are you doing? This is sick. And what I will tell you is if that phone is not in that bed with you and it's not on the bedside table and you can't just
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reach for it because it's a habit for you to reach for it. When it was the stands and buzzes and notifications or because you can't sleep. All just look at my phone.
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What a stupid idea. Because it's not there, you're not going to do it.
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And so there's a reason
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why you're having trouble sleeping. There's a reason why you wake up stressed out. There's a reason why you never have time for yourself. It's
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because you have shot yourself in the foot before you've even Close Your Eyes. By having that phone there. I think you can tell I'm getting a
39:29
little worked up and I'm getting a little worked up
39:31
because I didn't have to make my life so hard. I didn't have to do that and the solution to an empowering.
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Morning starts with how you show up for yourself the night before. It is really that simple. I wasted so many years of my life by making things way more difficult than they needed to be. If I had just gotten serious about these five simple things that I do. Now I would have felt more in control. I would have been a lot more. Calm, I would have felt like I was a good mom and a supportive partner.
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Owner. I wouldn't have felt so much
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frustration. Like, there's just so
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much available to you, if you get serious tonight, I want you to try it, and I want to help you. I have this free five day challenge. It all takes place in email. It's called The Wake Up Challenge
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and it's a simple 5 day free challenge.
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Where I will support you for five days and help you get out of bed and feeling control and feel more empowered, all you need
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Do is go to Mel Robbins.com, wake up, it'll start first thing tomorrow because you know what you deserve that
40:49
now, I know what you're thinking Mal, what about the morning routine?
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We are going to dig into the mechanics and the components based on research of a rock-solid morning routine, we will do that in one of the next couple episodes I promise. So if you have questions about it, go to Mel Robbins.com and submit your questions about morning routine. So we can make sure
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Sure that it's super relevant to what you're dealing
41:14
with. But
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in terms of the evening routine, try this tonight, make it easy for that future. You place a bet on the you that's waking up tomorrow. Give that person the support that they deserve. Because if you do
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that, trust me. The change is going to come faster. And it's going to be easier because you my friend will be supporting that change. All right. One more thing. I just wanted to say, I love you.
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I believe in you and I believe in your ability to try these things tonight and support yourself in a whole new way. Because when you do that, you will be creating a better morning for yourself and that creates a better day for yourself. And that day becomes a better week and that week becomes a better month and that month becomes a better year. And next thing, you know, along the way you became a better you and that's the
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The whole point of all of this go get after it. I love you. I'll talk to you in a few days.
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Oh, one more thing. It's the legal language. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician professional coach psychotherapist or other qualified professional Stitcher.
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